nostalgic-dreaming:

when someone says “ten years ago” i think about the 90’s not 2003

(via playthesims)

helioscentrifuge:

runtime-err0r:

itsvondell:

you can take one man’s trash to another man’s treasure but you can’t make it drink

Fun fact: the blending of idioms or cliches is called a malaphor.

My personal favorite is “We’ll burn that bridge when we get to it.”

I looked it up b/c that was a very familiar idiom and how could it be wrong but then

image

yeah wow that’s spot on perfect

(via playthesims)

recipesforweebs:

Ah, Ramen. The instant stuff weeaboos and college kids eat almost 3 times a day. What a treasure. You know what I’m gonna teach you what to make? Ramen that isn’t instant, and doesn’t taste like you poured an entire fucking salt shaker into your fucking bowl. God damn…MSG, amirite?
Anyway, this recipes like pretty fucking delish, so we’re gonna have a pretty rad time making it, okay?O FUCKING KAY.~Ponyo-style Ramen(servings: 1 bowl)adapted from: x
Ingredients for Home made noodles-
3/4 cups all purpose flour
1 egg
3/4 tsp salt (plus more to taste)
~1 Tbsp water (or more give or take)
Ingredients for soup-
2 cups pork or vegetable broth*
1 Tbsp fresh miso paste
1 tsp soy sauce (add more if you want it to be saltier)
1/4 tsp dashi granules
1/4 cup fresh bean sprouts
Ingredients for toppings-
1/2 scallion stalk
1 egg, hard boiled
1 piece of thick cut ham sliced in half
1 Tbsp olive oil
~Procedure for noodles-
Mix all of the dry ingredients together and make a small ‘well’ in the center of the mixture.
Mix all of the wet ingredients together and pour the mixture into the center ‘well’ of the dry ingredients.
Slowly combine the ingredients together until it becomes a hard dough.
Knead that dough hardcore motherfucker. Knead it the same way you need every little bit of merch with your waifu’s face on it. Yeah I know i said ‘need’ instead of ‘knead’. Fight me. I dare you.
Roll it into a ball and test the consistency. If it’s WAY too stick, add some flour, if it’s really hard and not sticky at all, add a TEENY bit of water. The dough should only be a tiny bit sticky, like not enough to stick anyway, u feel me
Once the doughs at the right consistency, wrap the dough ball in a dish towel and let that shit rest for like an hour. You rocked it’s work, tiger, and now it just needs to recharge a little. Am I implying you had sexual relations with a noodle? Yes. sort of. It’s been a long day.
Take the dough ball once it’s rested and sprinkle flour over that shit. Make it rain, holla. place it on a flour’d counter and use a rolling pin to flatten it out. Like real talk. Flatter than even the traps you gawk at whenever they show up on a thread in /a/. Don’t lie to yourself, everyone loves the traps. 
If the dough starts sticking during the rolling process, slap some more flour on that shit.
Put the dough sheet on your cutting board and spread a bunch of flour over it. Real talk, get reaaaaaal liberal about your flour use here. You DO NOT want your noodles sticking together once we cut them.
Fold the sheet two times in the same direction, spreading flour over the sheet each time you fold it.
Once it’s folded, start cutting it into thin noodles. If you think it’s going to start stick, add some more flour onto that biz.
Once you’re done cutting them and you have a huge ass pile of noodles, toy at them a little with your fingers to unfold and separate them a bit. Then toss that shit around with some more flour.
Get some water bowling, enough to cover all the noodles, and just sort of sprinkle the noodles in. If you plop em all in they’ll stick and shit, so don’t do that. 
Cook for abot 4 minutes, tasting a noodle occasionally to see if they’re done. I like undercooking mine a tiny bit so they fully cook in the soup.
Once they’re done cooking, strain them and place them in the bowl you’re gonna eat from. 
And bam. You finished the noodles. Are you proud of yourself? Do you want a hug? Fuck off, we’re not done yet ho we still got a WORLD of shit to finish before you can eat this mystical creation based off of Miyazaki’s food porn masterpiece.
Procedure for Soup-
In a medium sized pot, add the stock, dashi, and soy sauce. Bring it to a boil over high heat.
Remove from heat and stir in the miso. If you want to add more miso or something, fuckin go for it, it’s your life.
Add the bean sprouts in now so they warm up a little. Pour the soup into the bowl of noodles and stir it around so the bean sprouts and noodles are all intertwined.
Oh hot damn. You finished dat soup. Wow. how cool are you? Not that cool yet, because you still need to do the last few toppings you lil shitbaby.
Procedure for toppings-
Pour enough water to cover an egg into a small pot and bring to a boil. Once boiling, place the egg in gently and let it stay there for like 10 minutes.
Once the egg’s cooked for about 10 minutes, take that shit out and place it in a small bowl of ice water so it can cool down.
Once it’s cooled, remove the shell and cut it in half vertically. Place one of the halves on top of the ramen and eat the other one yourself with a sprinkle of salt because you deserve it. Love yourself a little.
Get some thick cut ham slices, like the thickest you can find, get a piece and cut it in half. Drizzle a frying pan with olive oil and let it heat up before placing the ham slices on there. 
Cook until heated up but not browned and place atop the noodles.
Thinly dice half the chive stock and place it atop the noodles as well.
~HOLY SHIT YOU JUST MADE YOURSELF SOME MIYAZAKI NOODLESARE YOU PROUD? YOU SHOULD BE. YOU BASICALLY MADE ART.No seriously, put that shit in MOMA and it will probably sell a lot quicker than like, fuckin, idk, cubism or whatever. Because Ramen always tastes better than oil paint, trust me.
Alright nerds, that’s Ponyo’s Ramen for you, enjoy eating literally 10 bowls of it while crying over fucking fish people you sad piece of trash.LOVE YOU, BYE

recipesforweebs:

Ah, Ramen. The instant stuff weeaboos and college kids eat almost 3 times a day. What a treasure. 

You know what I’m gonna teach you what to make? Ramen that isn’t instant, and doesn’t taste like you poured an entire fucking salt shaker into your fucking bowl. God damn…MSG, amirite?

Anyway, this recipes like pretty fucking delish, so we’re gonna have a pretty rad time making it, okay?

O FUCKING KAY.

~

Ponyo-style Ramen
(servings: 1 bowl)
adapted from: x

Ingredients for Home made noodles-

  • 3/4 cups all purpose flour
  • 1 egg
  • 3/4 tsp salt (plus more to taste)
  • ~1 Tbsp water (or more give or take)

Ingredients for soup-

  • 2 cups pork or vegetable broth*
  • 1 Tbsp fresh miso paste
  • 1 tsp soy sauce (add more if you want it to be saltier)
  • 1/4 tsp dashi granules
  • 1/4 cup fresh bean sprouts

Ingredients for toppings-

  • 1/2 scallion stalk
  • 1 egg, hard boiled
  • 1 piece of thick cut ham sliced in half
  • 1 Tbsp olive oil

~

Procedure for noodles-

  • Mix all of the dry ingredients together and make a small ‘well’ in the center of the mixture.
  • Mix all of the wet ingredients together and pour the mixture into the center ‘well’ of the dry ingredients.
  • Slowly combine the ingredients together until it becomes a hard dough.
  • Knead that dough hardcore motherfucker. Knead it the same way you need every little bit of merch with your waifu’s face on it. Yeah I know i said ‘need’ instead of ‘knead’. Fight me. I dare you.
  • Roll it into a ball and test the consistency. If it’s WAY too stick, add some flour, if it’s really hard and not sticky at all, add a TEENY bit of water. The dough should only be a tiny bit sticky, like not enough to stick anyway, u feel me
  • Once the doughs at the right consistency, wrap the dough ball in a dish towel and let that shit rest for like an hour. You rocked it’s work, tiger, and now it just needs to recharge a little. Am I implying you had sexual relations with a noodle? Yes. sort of. It’s been a long day.
  • Take the dough ball once it’s rested and sprinkle flour over that shit. Make it rain, holla. place it on a flour’d counter and use a rolling pin to flatten it out. Like real talk. Flatter than even the traps you gawk at whenever they show up on a thread in /a/. Don’t lie to yourself, everyone loves the traps. 
  • If the dough starts sticking during the rolling process, slap some more flour on that shit.
  • Put the dough sheet on your cutting board and spread a bunch of flour over it. Real talk, get reaaaaaal liberal about your flour use here. You DO NOT want your noodles sticking together once we cut them.
  • Fold the sheet two times in the same direction, spreading flour over the sheet each time you fold it.
  • Once it’s folded, start cutting it into thin noodles. If you think it’s going to start stick, add some more flour onto that biz.
  • Once you’re done cutting them and you have a huge ass pile of noodles, toy at them a little with your fingers to unfold and separate them a bit. Then toss that shit around with some more flour.
  • Get some water bowling, enough to cover all the noodles, and just sort of sprinkle the noodles in. If you plop em all in they’ll stick and shit, so don’t do that. 
  • Cook for abot 4 minutes, tasting a noodle occasionally to see if they’re done. I like undercooking mine a tiny bit so they fully cook in the soup.
  • Once they’re done cooking, strain them and place them in the bowl you’re gonna eat from. 
  • And bam. You finished the noodles. Are you proud of yourself? Do you want a hug? Fuck off, we’re not done yet ho we still got a WORLD of shit to finish before you can eat this mystical creation based off of Miyazaki’s food porn masterpiece.

Procedure for Soup-

  • In a medium sized pot, add the stock, dashi, and soy sauce. Bring it to a boil over high heat.
  • Remove from heat and stir in the miso. If you want to add more miso or something, fuckin go for it, it’s your life.
  • Add the bean sprouts in now so they warm up a little. Pour the soup into the bowl of noodles and stir it around so the bean sprouts and noodles are all intertwined.

Oh hot damn. You finished dat soup. Wow. how cool are you? Not that cool yet, because you still need to do the last few toppings you lil shitbaby.

Procedure for toppings-

  • Pour enough water to cover an egg into a small pot and bring to a boil. Once boiling, place the egg in gently and let it stay there for like 10 minutes.
  • Once the egg’s cooked for about 10 minutes, take that shit out and place it in a small bowl of ice water so it can cool down.
  • Once it’s cooled, remove the shell and cut it in half vertically. Place one of the halves on top of the ramen and eat the other one yourself with a sprinkle of salt because you deserve it. Love yourself a little.
  • Get some thick cut ham slices, like the thickest you can find, get a piece and cut it in half. Drizzle a frying pan with olive oil and let it heat up before placing the ham slices on there. 
  • Cook until heated up but not browned and place atop the noodles.
  • Thinly dice half the chive stock and place it atop the noodles as well.

~

HOLY SHIT YOU JUST MADE YOURSELF SOME MIYAZAKI NOODLES
ARE YOU PROUD? YOU SHOULD BE. YOU BASICALLY MADE ART.

No seriously, put that shit in MOMA and it will probably sell a lot quicker than like, fuckin, idk, cubism or whatever. Because Ramen always tastes better than oil paint, trust me.

Alright nerds, that’s Ponyo’s Ramen for you, enjoy eating literally 10 bowls of it while crying over fucking fish people you sad piece of trash.

LOVE YOU, BYE

(via no-indignity)

thebulkinator:

my-dear-psychopath:

These are probably the best things ever.

EVER.

IVE BEEN WAITING SO LONG FOR THIS

(via shinjutori)

simonabonafini:

My personal version of Game of Thrones’ cards.

Hope you’ll like them!

xombiedirge:

King Slayer by Chad Woodward / Blog
Part of the Game of Thrones art show, opening April 4th 2014, at the Bottleneck Gallery / Facebook.

xombiedirge:

King Slayer by Chad Woodward / Blog

Part of the Game of Thrones art show, opening April 4th 2014, at the Bottleneck Gallery / Facebook.

samswritingtips:

A breakdown of medieval armor, since a lot of pieces are required to create a full suit.

(via art-and-sterf)

anneboleyns:

anneboleyns:

these stills of joffrey look like someone just said something really offensive

image

image

image

image

(via axeljunk)

makeupbox:

How to use Duos, Trios, Quads, Quintets???! (A few basic shapes that work with all eye shapes)

The first thing I always tell people when it comes to eye shadow application is - find your socket line. And learn to separate that from your crease. 

image

There is a myth about applying shadows “on/within your crease”. Well that’s fine if you have very defined, even, thick lid folds. But if you have hooded eyes, mono-lids, or smaller lids where the crease is either not visible or not high enough, many eye-shadow looks can be very unflattering or they simply disappear when you open your eyes. 

What to do? Simply replace the word “crease” with “socket line” from today on. If you have mono-lids and hooded lids, it’s important to blend your shadows UP TO your socket line at least. That not only defines your natural contours but also widens the eye. 

  1. Your socket line is where your eyeball dips into your orbital bone. Close your eyes and feel for it.
  2. Flattering eyeshadow looks are all about "creating shadow and light" in the right places. Even if your eye contours aren’t very defined naturally, placing a bit of deeper color along your socket line and a pale shade in the center of your lid will create the illusion of more pronounced contours without making you look too dramatic.
  3. I DON’T recommend creating a fake socket line higher or lower than your natural one. It can go very very wrong unless you’re an absolute pro.
  4. Many times we use brushes that are way too big or fluffy. If you have small lids or eyes, a smaller, round-ferrule pencil brush like the one from 13rushes can make life a lot easier. Go for the flatter, wider brushes if you have a bigger lid space to work with. 

Now that we’ve got that covered, you can get back to the question of “what the heck do I do with this palette that has 2-3-4-5 shades?!” and look at the images above as a reference for where colors go.

Don’t be restricted by the image with the 4 shadow palettes and the labels on each of the shades. It’s there as a reference but the best thing is to look at the eye charts, because you can use any 2 shades in a quad or a 5-color palette as a duo using a DUO diagram.

Steps don’t include liner (optional) and mascara, so you just add them later.

THESE ARE NOT RULES. They’re just basic guidelines for those who aren’t too familiar with eye makeup yet. 

Lastly, when looking for eyeshadow palettes, here are some beginners’ tips:

  1. My palette has one cream/liner/glitter shade! Well, take those out of the equation and see how many regular shadows are left. If there are 3, shadows left, follow the TRIO diagram. If there are 2, follow the DUO diagrams. 
  2. Erm, so what do I do with base/liner/glitter shades? Apply the base all over from lash line to socket bone before you begin (you don’t need to go all the way to your brows unless you want a dramatic look). For glitter shades, you can apply them as a wash all over when you’re done with the rest of your eyeshadows, or down the center of the eye for a “wet look” when you blink. Liner shades are self explanatory!
  3. DUOS: look for those where 1 shade is the same lightness or lighter than your skin color, and 1 shade is darker/smokier. Doesn’t matter if they are metallic, shimmery, matte, sparkly. For most basic daily makeup looks, you just need a light and dark to define your eyes. 
  4. All palettes: make sure there is a "balance of light to dark shades". This means at least 1 softer shade and at least 1 dark shade that is deep enough to act as a definer shade. (There are a lot of palettes where all 3-4 shades are pretty shimmery pastels. Well, sorry but they’ll look nicer on your vanity table than on your face. You need a darker shade there for definition and contouring in order for the palette to look flattering. 
  5. QUADS: What do you do if there are 2 pale shades? Which should you apply on your brow bone, and which as an accent in the center of your eye? The less shimmery/sparkly one on the brow bone, and the more dramatic and reflective one on the center of the eye. If they’re about the same texture, then it doesn’t matter which you use where.
  6. 5-6 SHADE PALETTES: Many people find them overwhelming, but you really don’t need to wear all the colors everyday. You can pick 2-3 shades and wear them as a duo or trio (See diagrams) easily. So they actually give you the most options!

Some Idiot-proof Eyeshadow recommendations:

Duos: Laura Mercier eyeshadow duos. Always well coordinated, with 1 soft/matte shade and 1 darker, richer one. Takes the guess-work out of eyeshadow application.

Trios: A lot of drugstore brands like Wet n Wild Color Icon have pre-coordinated trios with the shades marked out as lid, crease, browbone for you. Just remember “crease” = socket line. In the higher end range, Dior’s 3 Couleurs are beautifully coordinated and easy to use and blend.

Quads: Tom Fords and Chanels have some of the easier to use luxe quads in the market, but if you’re going for the Tom Fords, remember to minus out the sparkle shades. (E.g. 01 Golden Mink is what I’d consider a duo, not a quad, because there are 2 sparkle shades out of the 4, and I’d apply the 2 satin shades using one of the DUO diagrams above, and then decide how I want to apply the sparkles.)

**Laneige Pure Radiant eyeshadow quads (S$40) are a fantastic alternative - not dupes cos there are no exact palette matches, but great alternatives - for Tom Fords (S$100) because the satins and glitter textures, as well as a few of the shades, are actually very very similar. If you love the look of TFs but find the prices a little steep in Asia, take a look at the Laneige counter! See for yourself!

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Quintets: Lancome’s Hypnose palettes are still one of my favorites. They usually have the BEST balance of dark and light shades, and they’re perfectly coordinated with each other, so you can pick any 2-3 shades out of the 5 and go.

**Diors are a good option if you have more mature lids or prefer smoother, more translucent pigments but the 5 couleurs are’t as well-balanced as Lancomes, so unless you’re very experienced and know how to add definition using liner and mascara, I’d pick a few colors and use these palettes as duos and trios rather than a quintet.

If you want to break the rules completely and do it like makeup artists do sometimes, NARS’ duos are pretty much on the opposite spectrum to Laura Mercier.

They do have light vs dark shades too, but there are also tons of funky clashing duos designed for maximum drama on the lids. Stuff like Rated R (lime and blue) and Bysance (yellow and violet) can still be applied using the 2 DUO diagrams above, but the final effect will be VERY bold. Probably better for the club than for school or work.

(via no-indignity)

urbancatfitters:

slytherin-starkid-of-tardis:

urbancatfitters:

everyone is embarrassed of their fourteen year old self trust me if you’re fourteen right now you will regret whatever it is that you are doing at this moment

What, being a SuperWhoLockian, Tumblrian, and just being generally pretty good? I don’t think so.

screenshot this and look at it in 3 years

(via axeljunk)

jonathanjo:

The 26 Pokeballs that you should know

(via axeljunk)